John Bowlby’s ‘attachment theory’ says that the close emotional bond between parents and their children is responsible for the bond that develops between adults in emotionally intimate relationships. The critical importance of earliest experience was a ‘revelation’ to me – helped me realise that emotionally deprived children aren’t only from poor backgrounds – but are just as likely from the world of nannies, boarding schools and grand houses; successful attachment has no connection with money or social class. Some children with ‘absent’ parents, will ‘bond’ with a granny or other carer; but ‘wee ones’ without love anywhere, will themselves, find it difficult to offer parenting: we can’t share what we’ve never known. ‘Disorganised attachment’ tends to manifest down the generations. Sadly, I think of our own royal family in this context.
Prince Philip was vaguely ‘around’ throughout my life – part of the furniture. I recognised in him something of the ‘outsider’- from a disrupted childhood with too many moving parts – ‘naebody’s bairn’. He was, of course, the remnant of a past era with little left to commend it, but his private ‘default self’ was feisty – an intelligent, disruptive curiosity, Verbal candour disguised a person deeply private and restrained, who would have hated the overblown reaction to his death. Philip’s most enduring tribute is likely to be the Duke of Edinburgh Awards, which over many years, have helped millions of young people realise their potential. I believe this initiative emerged from his own life experience, and that the Awards are an important legacy.
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Strong piece from Ciaran Martin in the Times this week, about the ‘profound understanding that the historic Union was an equal partnership based on consent’. He says that should Scotland return a pro-referendum majority on 6th May – then denying one would fundamentally change the Union. The Yes campaign’s ‘once in a generation’ soundbite from 2014 was just a slogan – with as much constitutional standing as ‘£350m for the NHS’ on the Brexit bus. Martin ends: “Some democracies such as Spain does not allow votes on a break-up. Spain does not claim to be a voluntary partnership of willing nations. Britain does. But is it?”
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I watch the Northern Ireland rioting with familiar dread and despondency. Lesley Riddoch in the Herald writes with exceptional confidence on this subject. During the thirty years of the NI ‘Troubles’ – ‘an informal justice system’ was operated by loyalist and republican paramilitaries; but I didn’t realise that these ‘punishments’ continued during the 20 years since the Good Friday Agreement. In this Conversation piece, two academics from University College London assess the present paramilitary influence.
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I have an inbuilt resistance to joining ‘intentional’ communities – regretfully; otherwise I’d have closer associations with Findhorn, in Moray, which has evolved impressively over the years. They suffered a serious fire this week (someone has been arrested) – but thankfully no-one was injured – and such incidents can trigger a ‘risorgimento’. We wish them well.
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I enjoyed this review in OpenDemocracy of a new book: Coal Country by Ewan Gibbs – which explores how Scotland’s lost coalfields transformed the nation’s political landscape. It suggests that Thatcherism, unwittingly drove vast numbers of working-class Scots away from their traditional loyalty to London rule. May 6th will indicate if this endures.
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If, like myself, you still feel remote from party electioneering – the Daily Record has identified five policies likely to be implemented regardless of voting: A National Care Service; Not Proven Verdicts scrapped; Scottish Child Payment; Free School Meals; ScotRail in Public Ownership. All pleasing – but I’m focused on the democratic outrage, that Scotland is governed by English Tories we didn’t vote for.
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This quote is from an interview Robbie Coltrane gave in August 2004; so much has happened in his life since then, that I’d love an update on his search for meaning or living without it; a fellow pilgrim.
“You are brought up to believe that if you are smart enough and you read enough you will find the meaning in things. But actually, in many ways, that’s a curse. All things that happen to you in life that make you happy or excited and fulfilled – have nothing to do with finding the meaning in things at all. Having children, for example, falling in love. If you are asking me if I’ve found the meaning in life, the answer is no, but part of getting on with your life is realising that perhaps there isn’t any meaning.”
