It’s nearly 20 years since I tasted alcohol (4th Sept 2001). Now I rarely even think about it – but I can understand how the pandemic links to a spike in problem drinking; Covid brings a new tension among us. In the marvellous 1949 classic, Whisky Galore, James Robertson Justice says: “It is well known that some people were born two drinks below par” – which is how I remember my early experience with ‘the drink’: all little fears vanished – a magical confidence bloomed – ‘Wow, this is the real me’.
Most people use alcohol to improve the way they feel, and, in moderation, it works very reliably. But if a person lacks the emotional maturity to face core life challenges, drink can become the means to sustain a dishonest relationship with oneself; alcoholism is firstly an illness of denial. By the time I finally accepted that ‘a drunk’ was not my ‘real’ self – I was 60 years old – had lost control of my addiction – was clearly destroying myself. My options had become – sober or dead.
An 80-year-old – like it or not – has a recurring impulse to reflect on the past; am I ‘ok’ with who I’ve been; is there more to cherish or regret in my story? This is mostly a subjective process – determined by the severity of our ‘internal’ parent: I’ve never really been able to ‘soften’ mine. It is an amusing irony, that I would deliver a much kinder appraisal of my life, if I were seated in a Costa del Sol beach bar, with a carafe of white wine.
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I remember attending, and writing about, the first conference in 2012 of the Radical Independence Campaign (RIC); a coalition of Scotland’s political left – those who see independence as an opportunity to pursue a green, post-capitalist economic order; Kevin McKenna’s Monday column informs that RIC has now folded. From the way they structured their ‘Growth Commission’ – it is clear that the SNP finds its comfort zone alongside corporates and private sector lobbyists; that their political direction drifts continuously right. I’ll vote SNP, because I want to send the resounding message; but Scotland’s radical left is running out of time to get itself into shape; which will only be our own fault.
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This is an article by Peter Geoghegan of openDemocracy, about their revelation that Michael Gove runs a secret govt unit to obstruct freedom of information requests; and how Fleet St editors have united to demand urgent action.
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Thirty years ago, Tim Berners-Lee invented the world wide web – famously declared: “This is for everyone.” Today his invention supports the infrastructure of the wealthiest companies on earth: GAFAM – Google, Amazon, Facebook, Apple, Microsoft. This Conversation article reviews current efforts by Berners-Lee and others to reclaim the internet into common ownership.
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Until I read this Scottish Review article by Tom Devine, I was unaware that Edinburgh Uni had ‘denamed’ its David Hume Tower – following a campaign that Hume was racist. Devine’s spirited reaction is that, by undervaluing Hume’s global reputation as a historian and philosopher – Edinburgh Uni got this wrong.
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A warehouse in Alabama could become the first Amazon union in the US – but the company (which has 1.3 million employees) has once again mobilised its massive resources against unionism. This article on the Wired site describes the current campaign and some of the potential implications.
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After 20 years of devolution, Scotland’s Landownership Laws are still the weakest and least restrictive in Europe; there simply isn’t the political will to upset the landed gentry. We learn this week, that the Scottish Land Commission has recommended new legislation to subject significant land sales to a public interest test. How can we re-energise this agenda?
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It is unclear to what extent, Charles Bukowski lived as a vagrant alcoholic; but his many depictions of ‘the low life’ feel authentic, almost celebrated – as in ‘How is Your Heart’:
“During my worst times – on the park benches – in the jails or living with bums – I always had this certain contentment – I wouldn’t call it happiness – it was more of an inner balance that settled for whatever was occurring and it helped in the factories and when relationships went wrong with the girls. It helped through the wars and the hangovers – the back alley fights – the hospitals. To awaken in a cheap room in a strange city and pull up the shade – this was the craziest kind of contentment – and to walk across the floor to an old dresser with a cracked mirror – see myself, ugly, grinning at it all. What matters most is how well you walk through the fire.”
